Shamed
I heard a 30 min sermon on how the fear of shame dictates our lives, and I must admit that I am ashamed to admit that it was true. Let’s be honest, shame rules the household, the school house, the playground, the workplace, the workout, the rock out, the make out…perception trumps reality. The walk of shame typically follows a night of indiscretion, especially if the Boggle 7 you bagged the night before turns out to be a morning-after 3.
Public shaming has long been considered one of the most severe forms of punishment (think The Scarlet Letter, Salute Your Shorts, the orange vests that the highway cleanup crews wear) because it attacks our inherent desire/need to belong. People lie to avoid the shame that their actions will generate, either to them or to others. Then, when the truth comes out, they’re ashamed for lying. Lose-lose at its finest.
So, naturally, I don’t have a solution. If I did, I’d be elsewhere, ruling a small nation. What I do know is that it comes down to the perceived present value of perception. You read that right, the PPVP. We do what we feel will leave us in the most positive light in others’ eyes at the current time, and ignore what the repercussions could be in the future. It’s human error and an utter failure, but our fight-or-flight instincts seemingly want to to delay the inevitable fight until we’ve already dug ourselves too deep of a hole. Do yourself a favor and cut your losses by admitting that you fucked up today, not tomorrow or two
If you want specifics, read any of the celebrity gutter blogs or follow the various sports scandals out there (steroids, point shaving, tampering, bribery, whore indulgences). But let’s focus on the silver lining: Life itself isn’t just one big crying shame…it’s only when we decide to act like idiots.
